Yesterday was a tough day to get out of bed. Never mind that the coffee and the bathroom is excluded in my quest to truly praise God for His sovereign plan of Trent being in heaven every morning before my feet hit the floor; I crossed my legs and went on with the soul searching. As I was trying to fake my way through it so I could just get downstairs and start the day, the thought dawned on me that this was the God of the universe that I was talking to. He knows my heart and my real thoughts. I can't be fake before Him. I grabbed my Bible from the chair beside the bed and randomly opened up to Zechariah. Amazing promises from my Savior that is leading me. A little flicker of hope again, closer to praising, closer to joy. As I finished my prayer, and was actually rejoicing, I asked God one more thing. I asked him to just send some encouragement today. I have resolved to be content to let Him do with Trent's death what He wants, but I have never quit asking Him to use it in a mighty way to glorify His name. I long to leave it all in God's hands and trust whatever He has chosen to do with it, but sometimes (like all the time) I just want to see a glimpse of His work. "A little encouragement would make this so much easier today, God," I told Him.
I expected a sweet email, or an encouraging comment (which He also sent, thanks for being faithful dear ones), but He went above and beyond that as well. In very clear, God guided motives, my little sister showed up before lunch time. We laughed, we cried, we hugged, we talked, we ate, but above all, we rejoiced in God's work. Oh, His amazing work! His clear work that can't be denied that is going on right before our eyes. Eternities that have been changed because of that day in February. Prayers answered. Hearts changed. Souls saved. Praising a good God that does have this all planned out.
Today I woke up empowered by that work. I remembered that God does hear our every little plea. He sees our broken hearts. He is enough if we will let Him be. I woke up truly rejoicing for a son in heaven before my eyes even opened this morning. I prayed more intently than I have in days. I specifically lifted up before the Lord the young doctor that cared for Trent that afternoon in that emergency room just like I told him I would: for his salvation, for conviction of sin, for God's work in his life. I trust my Savior's leading. Today it is easier to follow Him.
"This third I will bring into the fire; I will refine them like silver and test them like gold. They will call on my name and I will answer them; I will say, 'They are my people,' and they will say, 'The Lord is our God.'"
Zechariah 13:9
8 comments:
I looove these photos! Your daughter is growing up so fast and so pretty. May the Lord continue to give you comfort and encouragement.
Marcia~ God has used you to bless me today. Thank you. Your words will not be forgotten. Yes, His mercies are new every morning!
About the book comment:
I actually have a book in the publishing process. After Trent's death, God made it clear that I was to write publicly about His good works. I'm hoping that it will be hot-off-the-presses in a few weeks.
Thank you pilgrimscottage~ my affirmation driven side thanks you too:)) These were actually such silly pictures when we took them, and I didn't expect any to turn out. I love 'em, too!
Beautiful message, encouraging, and beautiful photos! Where in the world did you get such of a great-photo-op chair???!!
Yah, I know Traci, isn' that chair great?! There's this guy that insists on gifting me with all these wonderful treasures~ I could introduce you if you'd like:))))
Ahhhh It just amazes me the little things he hears,knows and provides. I know he is God of the Universe but why does he choose to answer my petty little pleas Not saying our prayers are petty but thats how I feel sometimes. So glad you were encouraged and lifted up.
Your photos of Grace are absolutely beautiful! She is such a beautiful girl. I am so glad you were encouraged by His loving attention to your request. I've been praying each morning that the day will be a good day for you. I love you my friend! You are a blessing to so many people!
Brenda~ it brought me great joy this morning as I sat in my recliner reading my Bible and talking to God to think about you praying for me:)) I prayed for you, too, specifically for salvation for your son. I love you, too, dear lady. Thank you for being my faithful prayer warrior to help carry me through. I am doing this only by God's grace.
You are loved. Even across miles and from someone you have never met, because we both belong to Him. Someday you and I will sit and talk...in eternity. We will be friends face-to-face girlfriend. I love that about God. He is so nice!
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